Vexalt

Welcome back! It has been far too long since I posted here; I am delighted to be back, and appreciate you, my readers, so very much. While I’m still navigating life’s chaos, I want to return my attention to this project. If I wait for perfect circumstances, it’s likely I would never have picked things back up. I have missed writing and using the internet to share connection; and there is so much to write about now. Life can get dark, and I hear from so many others I talk to about the seeming baseline of struggle we are dealing with nowadays. My recent absence from even things I love, like this blog, goes to show what happens when we ignore our warning signs and try to push beyond our limits. If things are painful or difficult, there is probably a reason for that.

Where have I been?

I have been managing a small stack of health issues, physical and mental, after I completely burnt out at my previous job. This experience, and finally beginning to receive diagnoses, has thrown the fact that I have several disabilities into sharp definition. I seem to have a rather neurodivergent mind, as well as some of the physical health issues that commonly cluster with it such as hypermobility. This means, between physically demanding work and sensory overstimulation, maintaining a conventional work output has been outright painful. As an example, something as simple as bright lighting can feel as if I have sand in my eyes. Denial of this has not served anything, one must see a problem before one can attempt to address it.

This explains why my path in life has been so outright difficult, and in my healing journey I have met several people who strongly resonate with my experience. I imagine a large part of our world shares an experience of feeling that they have to push themselves beyond healthy limits to maintain a life in modern, western society. The effort involved in pursuing growth and the related discomfort, like the ache that signals an effective workout, is one thing; being pushed to violate needs of physical, mental, and spiritual well-being is another story. With the growth of technology, infrastructure, and efficiency I do not believe there is any justification for our society pushing people beyond healthy limits, especially in such a wide-spread way. Have you experienced this?

What can be done about this?

Pointing out and decrying that life is becoming abusive to average individuals is one thing, yet doing something about it is notably more difficult. This is all the more challenging when one is struggling to keep their head above the proverbial water, despair and nihilism have a loud siren call in this broken world. But in looking for help, I have found that there are good people and supportive resources out there for those who are struggling, disabled, or otherwise afflicted. This pain and difficulty serves to illuminate a need for change and opportunity for growth.

The system may very well be flawed, but I believe that the vast majority of us trapped within it have goodwill towards each other. And together we can make something better for everyone. These structures which appear to reward predatory and parasitic practices are no justification for anyone to be stuck in struggle of any sort. If this sounds like you, please reach out to seek support. Life is already a struggle, choose the pain that supports you over the pain of being exploited. We all are meant to live in peace.

Seeking support

This path of seeking what supports me has lead through so many subjects. A need to center and ground has always called me to time in nature, which is so very good for living beings. Struggles with income and healthcare costs have driven me to learn more about the economy, how things have gotten this bad, and what could possibly be done about it. A need to take better care of myself has me exploring passions more, reengaging with things like writing and crochet. The need for work also has me contemplating how else I can support myself; I would love to make things like this blog into a source of income, sharing ideas and learning. As I learn to manage my own business, I may be able to offer that assistance to others. Or perhaps I can offer my diverse knowledge and outside perspective in general, as some form of polymathic consultant.

Community in many forms is another type of support I have been exploring; everything from minority and mental health programs, to participating in shared spiritual practice, to celebrating shared interests in a group. Spirituality has been shown to have great benefits, and while it can be pursued individually and through written works, there are great advantages to what Buddhists might call “admirable friendships”. But community does not need to be so formal, I have found great comfort in a good concert; celebrating music which speaks to me alongside those who share that passion. And none of that even mentions connecting with community online, like with this blog.

It has been a long road, but I’m happy to be getting back on the horse and resuming this part of my adventure. There are lessons to be learned in the struggle; like committing to regularity after one has consistent systems in place, not before. But now I have returned, and I have so much I want to share with you, my dear readers. From connecting with nature, to economic indignancies, to crafting and hobbies, to alternative career paths, to community organizations, to spirituality, and even good alternative music… where to begin? I would love to hear what you find interesting for me to write about next, or what you have found supportive in your own journeys! Please let me know in the comments below, or start a direct conversation using my new email:

I believe that we are meant to live in peace, and together we will be able to create a world where that is possible for the vast majority. But is will certainly be a journey to get there. For now, please take good care of yourselves, before your systems collapse too and demand the care and gentleness. Listen to your body’s signals, pursue those things which fill you with passion, and build the life that you need. I believe you are capable of great things; now go do them, whatever they may be!